How Your Mindset Dictates Your Behaviour

This week I've been thinking a lot about mindset. As you probably know I work leaders particularly around their leadership capability and helping them become exceptional communicators. 

During a coaching session earlier this week, I was speaking with one of my executive clients, and we got on to the topic of mindset, specifically, shifting her perspective to shift her mindset. As we were finishing up, she said, "you know, I love our sessions, I always feel better, more positive, more optimistic and like I can do anything." Boom! yes, yes you can!

Do you believe that you can change your mindset?

As a Neurolinguistic Practitioner (NLP) I'm very interested in the words we use and the impact that has on our overall beliefs and mindset. 

In short, A belief is a conviction or acceptance that something is true or exists. These convictions shape your thoughts, feelings, and actions. They are often formed from personal experiences, cultural influences, and education.

The Relationship Between Beliefs and Growth Mindset

You've probably heard about a growth mindset, and a fixed mindset (if not, start here with Carol Dweck's TedTalk). A growth mindset is a belief system. It's the belief that your abilities and intelligence can be developed through dedication and hard work. Conversely, a fixed mindset is the belief that your qualities are static and cannot be changed significantly.

Your beliefs form the foundation of your mindset. If you believe your intelligence, capability and skills is fixed, you're likely to adopt a fixed mindset. If you believe your intelligence, capability and skills can grow, you're more likely to cultivate a growth mindset. I love working with exceptional leaders who already have a growth mindset, but are usually stuck with some limiting beliefs about how exceptional they are and can be!

I’ll use the iceberg model to illustrate this.

Anatomy of an Iceberg

You’ve probably seen an iceberg, if not in real life then through pictures or movies like The Titanic. So, you must know that the part of the iceberg under the water causes a whole bunch of problems and is responsible for a lot of things that happen. When you apply the iceberg model on the mindset perspective, you touch on the topic of behaviours and beliefs. Behaviours make up the tip of the iceberg, while beliefs make up the rest of the iceberg under the surface.

Behaviours and Beliefs

Behaviours include your goals, visions, values and strategies—whether its personal or your organisation’s. These are what you do and where you think you get all the work and results done. It’s also what people see.

In this age of social media, the highlight reels that people see in different platforms are also just the tip of the iceberg.

Underneath the water is the big chunk of your beliefs—all the turmoil and actual stuff that make you behave the way that you do like assumptions, norms, limiting beliefs, culture, perceptions, stories, conditioning, feelings, and unwritten rules. In other words, your conscious mind is your behaviours and your subconscious mind is your Beliefs.

Since it makes up a large part of your mindset, your beliefs can dictate your behaviour.

The Power of Beliefs and the Art of Reframing

Your beliefs are the architects of your reality. Unconsciously formed over time, they shape your thoughts, feelings, and actions. The good news is, once we become aware of these beliefs, we can begin to reshape them.

Dr. Libby Weaver highlights the role of internal narratives in stress. The stories you tell yourself can significantly impact your well-being. To counter these often-inaccurate tales, we must first recognise their presence and then challenge their validity.

Reframing, a core NLP technique, is a powerful tool for altering your perspective. It involves looking at a situation from a different angle, finding alternative interpretations, and replacing limiting beliefs with empowering ones.

For instance, instead of viewing a challenging situation as a setback, reframe it as an opportunity for growth. Or, if you believe you're "not good enough," challenge that thought by focusing on your strengths and accomplishments.

To effectively reframe, try these steps:

1. Identify the limiting belief: Clearly define the thought or belief holding you back.

2. Challenge the evidence: Question the validity of the belief by seeking counter-examples.

3. Generate alternative perspectives: Explore different ways of viewing the situation.

4. Adopt a new belief: Replace the limiting belief with a more empowering one.

Can You Change Your Mindset?

Absolutely! While deeply ingrained beliefs can be challenging to modify, they are not set in stone. With conscious effort and practice, you can shift your mindset from fixed to growth. This involves:

• Identifying limiting beliefs: Recognizing the beliefs that hinder your growth.

• Challenging those beliefs: Questioning the validity of these beliefs.

• Replacing them with growth-oriented beliefs: Cultivating new beliefs that support your development.

• Taking action: Engaging in behaviours consistent with a growth mindset.

Remember, belief change is a journey, not a destination. Consistent practice and self-compassion are essential. By mastering the art of reframing, you can unlock your full potential and create a life aligned with your desires. Change takes time. Give yourself some grace. Be patient with yourself and celebrate small victories along the way.

Do you have a pesky belief that limiting you and getting in the way?

Until next time, Eat the Frog, Get the Worm, Be the Bird and Challenge your beliefs, especially if they're not helping you.

---

Ally Nitschke is a best-selling Author, an award-winning Thought Leader and Speaker. She has been working with leaders and as a Leader for over 20 years.

She is on a mission to change the way we communicate at work, to lean into those uncomfortable conversations and lead with courage.

Ally is a Keynote Speaker at conferences, delivers Transformational Programs & highly engaging workshops as well as provides Executive Coaching.

In her spare time, she's mostly at the beach with her beautiful husband and 4 tiny people.